Switchin' It Up
by BadAssBarracuda
Summary: After the war, the ministry decided that they would bring all people together by having them participate in the new project "The Switch". In which they pick two family's, one muggle and one halfblood/pureblood and have them live in each others homes.
1. Chapter 1

**I realized two things that day. Roxanne has a bad temper and peanut butter and pickles don't mix , I'm Hermione. Hermione Granger. Today, was supposed to be just like any other day. I would get up, make breakfast, drive Roxanne to school, then pick her up at the principles office when she hurts some poor defenseless boy who pisses her was my life. I was happy with it, even the part were Roxanne would beat the shit out of any kid that stood in her way. Until that fateful day. . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . .Hermione Granger woke up at the sun's rise. She yawned arching her back to get out the kinks of the nights sleep. Shuffling out of bed, Hermione dragged herself to her closet, picking out the first thing she saw. A pair of dark skinny jeans and a tight black tee-shirt that went mid-thigh saying; "If you think I'm a bitch you should meet my mother" and if you ever met her mother. . . Well, read the slipped on a pair of black knee-high converse and laced them up tightly. Stretching her legs one more time she walked to the bathroom that she shared with her brother Hayden. Skipping into the bathroom she groaned when she saw that he was brushing his teeth. . . As naked as the day he was born."Jesus Hay, put on some clothes!" Hermione screamed , covering her eyes."Come on Hermione you know you like the view!" Hayden Smirked, spitting his toothpaste into the sink."MY VIRGIN EARS!" Hermione yelled running down the steps, hoping over the last heard the muffled laugh of Hayden and the sentence; "VIRGIN MY ASS!"Hermione rolled her eyes. Sitting down at the kitchen table****, the door to Roxanne's room opened to reveal said person."What was all that screaming about? I could hear it all the way from down here, wait. . . Your still a virgin?" Roxanne laughed pouring herself a bowl of was 11, but beautiful. She had thick black hair like her step mom and blue/gray eyes like her dad. Well, Roxanne wasn't really her sister. She was her half sister. But, she looked almost exactly like Hermione except for the hair color and you could call "Emo". She had hot pink and baby blue strands of color in her black hair and a piercing through her tongue. She did that herself mind you, but my dad warmed up to it, just like he warmed up to Hay's tattoo of wings covering his back."Yes, unlike someone that's standing butt naked in my bathroom." Hermione said jerking her head to indicate the stairs."Hmmm, makes sense. You were always a prude." Roxanne teased. Draining the rest of the milk in her bowl."Hey! I'm not a-" Hermione was cut off by a magnificent black owl swooping into the kitchen. The owl perched itself on the mantel and Roxanne ran to get the letter off it's leg."I've loved these owls'." She stated watching the owl fly picked up the note, which Roxanne dropped on the plopped on the couch while Hermione scanned the page.**_**Dear Granger Family,Since the great war, we at the Ministry have noticed there is still a barrier between the Muggle world and the Wizard world. So, we have devised a **__**new project**__** called "The Switch". In which we choose a muggle family and a wizard family and put them in each others house hold for four months each and see how each other is a form that you or your family may fill out to say that you would like to participate in this program. Thank you are well,Albus Dumbledore**_**Minister of Magic**Hermione grinned. This was a great idea on the ministry's part. Her grin disappeared when she realized something. . . How am I going to tell dad and December that we might not be living in our home for four months?**This is only part 1 Of the Granger chapters. The next chapter will be called The Ministry Sucks! Please review!**


	2. Peanut Butter and Pickles

Hermione looked up from the letter to see Roxanne with her book bag slung un-ceremoniously over her small shoulders. One shaped eyebrow was quirked in a questionable fashion."Are you going to give me a ride, or gawk over that letter for hours?" She smirked. Hermione rolled her golden eyes and shrugged. Without a word she picked up her keys and together they half way there Hermione turned to face Roxanne, who was nodding her head rhythmically to Black Veil Brides; Mortician's Daughter. Hermione switched off Andy Sixx's voice and looked over at Roxanne who had a pursed lips and a pouty face on."Okay, this is your last day at school. Please, for the love of God. . .don't hurt anymore students!" Hermione begged as they pulled up to the said school building. The red and brown bricks seemed to mock Roxanne that she had to endure 8 more hours of hell."Fine, but I won't like it." She retorted. Hermione parked in the nearest parking space. Hermione smiled in triumph. Victory really is sweet! Roxanne hopped out of the car and trotted to the building. Hermione chuckled as she drove off to work at Ice Cream worked 5 hours serving ice cream, when her shift ended and she raced home, desperate for a nice hot shower. She parked in front of her house, it was lovely. It was a cabin type build, with hard oak as the siding. There was a small lake that they stored coy fish in and a quad race track for Roxanne and Hermione and a small race zone for parked and walked into the comfort of her home. The kitchen took up the right side of the room, with a dining table on the far right. The living-room had a burgundy couch and matching carpet and chairs. A medium sized T.V was placed against the wall, right next to the stair , there was a rather tiny bathroom with only a toilet and a sink. There was Jayden's room, next to Mom and Dad's room. Jayden's room was a jet black color with a red carpet with posters' and pictures lining the 's parents room was a tan color with hard wood flooring, and a fire place. Hermione shared a room with Roxanne. Her half was purple and neon green. Her bed spread was zebra striped and had matching curtains and fuzzy 's half was red and had pictures of her favorite movies, singers, actors/actresses, anything that she could find. Hermione walked over to the bed and lay down, closing her eyes. She was disturbed by the door squeaking open to reveal clock read 12;00. . . Uh-oh."Roxanne. . . Why are you home? Did you hurt another student?" Hermione accused, smirked."You said I couldn't hurt the STUDENTS. . . You said nothing about the TEACHERS!"***"I think it's a brilliant idea!" Hermione's dad stated, reading the letter addressed to the family. Hermione was about to jump for joy when; "But, that might not be possible." December, Hermione's step-mom said."But why not?" Hermione whined."Because. . . . Because. . . Oh, I'll tell you all at dinner." She scoffed and walked away."PLEASE! Daddy! PLEASE!" Hermione begged."Wait and see what your mother says ,Hermione, It's very important." He scolded and also walked away.**AT DINNER;**"How can you eat that?" Roxanne asked. Suggesting to her pig of a brother's peanut butter and pickle sandwich."Try it." He said shortly. She did as told and swiftly flew into the bathroom to throw up."Now will you tell me why we can't go?" Hermione whined once more, acting like a child."Going were?" Roxanne interrupted, having arrived back at the dinner table. But, the adults payed her no mind."Okay. . . Your step-mother and I are having a baby!" Hermione's dad said."WHAT?" screamed the three children."It's true. A baby girl." December said in a whimsical voice."I still don't see why we can't go. I mean, me and Jayden can always protect Roxanne. . . Or vise versa. . ." Hermione was cut short by Her step-mother putting her hand up, effectively stopping her."Marshall, I think we should let the kids go. It could be a good experience for all of us. Me and you can stay here for 4 months and then when the family comes here we'll welcome them with open arms."Hermione's dad couldn't disagree with that and they spent the rest of dinner telling Roxanne and Jayden about the letter. Just before dessert, they decided to fill out the form.**Family Last Name;**_Granger_**Persons Participating in this;**_Roxanne Marie Granger, Hermione Jean Granger, Jayden Wess Granger_**Personal Information (Medical problems, ext.);**_Roxanne; anger management problems, is fine when around people though._**Signature;**_Marshall Mather Granger. _The sheet turned a dazzling gold and a name fluttered down on the plate in front of Jayden. "Who are the "Maloufs"?" he snatched the name."The Malfoys' you twat! There're the people who tried to kill me for 7 years." Hermione said scoffed. "You mean to tell me that we will be living with murderers for 8 months?"Hermione nodded."Man, the ministry SUCKS!" Roxanne added, earning agreeable nods with the whole family.**PART 2 IS DONE! YAY!**


	3. Malfoy Madness and Sex Talk

"Those peoplecan not. . . Will not live with us." Draco stated, crossing his arms in a leader typed Malfoy rubbed her temples in frustration.

"Draco, please. We have to show the Wizarding World that we have been working with the ministry, and what better way to do it-"Lucius cut in.

"Son, we are having the guest stay here and that's final. Now, go clean up the guest rooms, we pick them up tomorrow afternoon."

And with that Draco stomped to the guest rooms to clean.

"Do you think he's mad?" asked Narcissa worriedly.

"No. . . he's down right pissed." Lucius smirked.

Narcissa swatted his arm playfully. Her husband faked a hurt pout and she laughed.

"You are such a wimp." She giggled.

He pursed his lips and glared at her.

"My ego thanks you oh so much." He teased.

"You're very welcome. Now, lets go see hoe Draco's doing, shall we?" She said extending a hand to help him up.

When they walked in, Draco was sitting on the bed mumbling to himself.

Narcissa sighed.

"Draco, we know you like Miss. Granger, and your stupid pride won't let you say it, but please, try and cooperate. "

Dracolooked bewildered."I do not like Hermione! Maybe for a good shag, but no. . . just. .. .no."

"DRACO ABERAX MALFOY! DO NOT USE SUCH VULGER LANGUAGE IN MY HOUSEHOLD!" Screamed Lucius.

"What? Do you want me to say sex? Because I will not say "made love" until I actually do "make love"." Draco snapped.

"Please Draco, just try. For me?" Narcissa plead.

Draco finally gave up.

"Fine, but don't expect me to be nice if she's not."

Narcissa smiled."Thank you."

And with that his parents stalked out of his lay back on the green silk bedspread. His thoughts ran to Hermione. How much she's grown over the years. He though of how well developed her breast were, how plump her rosy lips were, how much he wanted to fuck her.

He was falling for the Mudblood know it all. This was not good. Not good at all. Draco hopped off the bed and turned to the kitchenette that was ironically placed next to his room. He popped open a bottle of fire- whisky and thought; _This is madness. . . Malfoy Madness._

Tomorrow couldn't have come sooner. The Grangers loaded their belongings in the trunk and climbed in through the open door. Roxanne was squished between her brother and sister.

"Move your ass, loser." she yelled pushing Jayden.

"Shut up smartass" He retorted.

"I'm not a smartass!"

"Would you rather be a dumb-ass?" Asked Hermione, cutting into the conversation.

"No, that role goes to, Jayden." Roxanne said giving him a innocent smile.

"I feel so touched." He said placing his hand over his heart for emphasis.

Hermione laughed as her dad and December came into the crowded car.

She really did love her family. They could be a pain in her ass sometimes, but she loved them.

"Now kids," started Hermione's dad. "Your mother and I feel that we should have 'The Talk' with you since you will be going to god knows where for 4 months."

_Uh-oh_

"Now, there are four kinds of sex. House sex is for newly weds who want to 'Break in' their new house. Bedroom sex is for people who have children and have only their rooms. Hall sex is for people who have been married a REALLY long time and now just pass each other in the hall to say 'Fuck You'."

Roxanne laughed at that one.

"And my all time personal favorite, Courtroom sex is when your wife and her lawyer fuck you in the divorce court in front of many people for every penny you've got. Now, you all have enough time to screw your life over, so don't do it so early, okay?"

The kids couldn't help it anymore, they to soon, they arrived at the train a tearful goodbye, the children boarded the train with the other switching children. The last thing they saw was their step mother clutching her stomach in pain.


End file.
